You have surely met someone who is so blinded with their own pride that they don’t want to accept what they did was wrong nor take any sort of responsibility. They have somehow in their head justified their own greed, lust, gluttony, wrath, envy, or laziness. And that’s exactly why pride is the most dangerous sin of them all.
It is not that easy owning up to the things you did wrong, because everybody has a bit of pride in them. We have a natural defence mechanism to put ourselves in the victim role to protect ourselves and our pride during the face of conflict. That’s what makes us human along with those other feelings of greed, wrath, envy etc. The most important thing is that we become self-aware of our emotions, how they affect our actions and how those actions affect other people.
You need to realize that by protecting your own pride, you are potentially hurting your long distance relationship. When you’re significant other has come to you to talk about something hurtful that you did, it’s not time to take the offensive and blurt out every reason to justify it. By doing this, you are belittling your significant other for feeling the way they do and labelling their feelings as invalid. It doesn’t matter how you feel in that situation at the moment- the fact is that you did something that hurt your significant other, so don’t make it about you. Acknowledge that you hurt them and apologize properly. Your apology should not include the word “but” or any other word equivalent.
Because of our natural defence mechanism to take the victim role, we believe that admitting that you’re wrong and taking responsibility somehow makes you a less respectable or weak person in their eyes. In all reality, it does the opposite. Understanding that you’re not perfect and taking action to fix your mistakes shows growth and maturity. That’s something you can take pride in.